Life has felt very much at a juxtaposition lately.  One moment asking why has life been so challenging and the next playing and laughing with my daughter, my class or my friends.  This has made life feel chaotic and content all at the same time.  I am working on being self-compassionate…this is very hard.  I have made a life habit of being too hard on myself.  Along with putting a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect.  Except it has come to my attention that I am trying to be perfect by society and my own unrealistic expectations.  This is where the self compassion is coming in to play.  I have worked a lot on saying it is okay if I don’t get to everything today.  As always it will be there tomorrow and as long as no one is hurt (including myself) by not getting to it today all is well.

The why’s:  there is a quote about being given the life you can handle.  Basically stating that we are given so many challenges because we are “strong enough” to handle them.  I can now confidently say I am strong enough to handle them.  However, why do I have to be SO strong all the time.  When do I get to lean on someone else?  Why so many tests in this life?  What am I to learn from being SO strong so much of the time?

I know I am not the only person who feels this way, but in our society it is not ok to share out loud these thoughts…that makes you broken and weak.  Not many people are equipped with the compassion to listen with an open heart and not judge others in their time of need.  How do we make this change?  When will it be seen as a strength to be self-compassionate and compassionate towards others?  I hope one day soon we can move towards being more compassionate to everyone including ourselves!